The other day I read an article about the five top regrets of the dying. Worth a read if you haven't seen it yet. It got me thinking about how I wanted to be remembered and what living without regrets would mean for me.
For the world
I want to world to remember me as someone who surpassed what was expected. Raised by a single mom with no help from my father, my childhood was not exactly filled with the finer things in life. My brother and I had what we needed, and as a mom I am amazed how good my mom did and how well she coped with our circumstances which were hard at times. Considering my start in life, I'm quite proud of where I am. Both my brother and I own houses, have travelled, and I will be the first person in my family (that I'm aware of) to get a degree - I'll be 44 years old when I do. As parents, we want our children to have a better time of growing up and more opportunities than we ever did, and I know that this has been true for me. I've had some really good opportunities to do well, and I am proud to have embraced them. One of the best compliments my mom ever gave me was that she said I was ambitious. I want the world to see that.
For me
I would like to think that at the end of my life, I have lived an existence that was all mine. Hand-crafted and specifically to my liking. I know my decisions have not always been popular, but I can say they have been what I thought at the time was best for me. I am drawn to people who dare to live, who are different and who live the life they were meant to live and want to live! I want to know at the end that I did the very same.
For my girl
I want my girl to remember me as someone who loved her "more than all the sand on the beach." Watching her grow up has been the highlight of my life and I have enjoyed every moment. I want my girl to see me as someone who was an individual, with my own thoughts and ideas and who offered an alternate opinion that gave her something to think about. I want her to remember me as the person who supported who she was and always encouraged her to listen to that still, small, voice inside when faced with decisions. And a mom who was happy to "just be" with her whenever possible.
So that's it! I must say, this was one weird post to write. It's not often I think about not being here, but then I thought of it like writing an eulogy.. it's not a bad idea.
So what about you? What impression would you like to leave behind - to the world and for yourself?
